A Love Lost and A Love Found
by Sammy06
Summary: Aranel has witnessed the loss that being a Dwarves' One can cause. She has seen the pain and heartbreak that comes along with being the soul mate of these greedy creature. But, after she meets Fili, these feelings of hatred to the Dwarvish race start to fade. She learned the happiness and wholeness that comes with this small spark that two people can share.
1. Prologue

PROLOGUE

Vana hurried towards her and her husband's chambers, her joyous smile growing wider as she left the main halls of Erebor where the physician lied, and came into the smaller halls where the housing chambers rested. As she slid around a corner, she crashed into a familiar guard.  
"Careful mi'Lady," he stated, placing a hand on her shoulder to steady the panting woman.  
"Yes, of course. Thank you Brogal," she replied, grinning sheepishly up at the dwarf.  
"And what has you in such high spirits on this fine day, hmm?" he asked curiously, decided to walk alongside her for a moment.  
"Can't say, I'm sorry, tis' but a surprise," she twinkled up at him. She was such a small thing, he thought to himself and he just huffed in response.  
"And again, I am terribly sorry, but I must get to Dwalin. Have you by any chance, seen him?"  
"Ah, yes, I believe I saw him heading to your particular stretch of housing chambers a couple of minutes ago, actually."  
She was off before he even finished the sentence, yelling over her shoulder a, "Thank you Brogal. I will see you at dinner!" Before she continued towards her chambers. The dwarf only shook his head and continued walking to his post at the watch tower.

Vana managed to catch her warrior brute of a husband as he was leaving their home. "Dwalin!" she called. Hearing the yell, the massive dwarf turned his head only to see his wee little wife running his way. Seeing that she had no intention of slowing her pace he braced himself for the impact. As she had predicted, her husband had caught her steadily and safely. She knew, with complete and utter surety that he would never let anything harm her.  
She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him in for a bruising kiss.  
"And what was that for may I ask ye, lass?" he asked in his thickly accented voice as they finally parted.  
"I have news!" she nearly yelled excitedly, "I went to the physician to see him about the stomach pains and vomiting, like you suggested an-."  
Before she could finish, she was lifted into his arms while he checked her over for injuries. "Are ye okay lass? It's nothing serious is it? You alright, aren't ye?" he exclaimed worriedly.  
She laughed lightly in response, "Of course I am but-." She was once again cut off, but by this time it was from a voice echoing throughout all the halls of Erebor, "DRAGON!"  
Vana huddled closer to Dwalin when the shout was followed by a great and mighty roar.  
She was suddenly grabbed by the shoulders, "Lass, listen tah me. Ye have tah get out. Go straight tah the servant exit through the kitchens. I'll find ye when we get out alright?"  
His voice was firm and solid, but then the meaning of his words hit her like a warhammer to the head. "Wh-what? What about you?" She practically whimpered, and tried to steal herself.  
"I'll be fine lass, now go!" He ushered her towards the kitchens, knowing that the dragon would take the front gate as an entry to the gold. He moved to go to the Great Hall to make sure the King got out safely when his name was called again, he turned back towards his wee wife, his One, to be met with another searing kiss.  
"I love you. No matter what happens, remember that," she whispered against his lips.  
"I love ye too lass, now go." He watched her until she was out of sight, and then continued onward to his destination.

Vana searched through the scattering crowds. There was utter chaos reigning, surrounding her, suffocating her, stealing away her breath. She had managed to help some people out, now; however, she was searching for the towering form of her love. A horn broke through her dazed search and she looked up towards the slopes to be greeted by the sight of the Great Elven King Thranduil, his army of elves armed and ready for battle. Though they made no move to help. No move to help the burning city, no moves to help stop the screaming of the people. She stared at them, _how could they do this?_ She thought, just stand there and watch people burn and flee, without lifting a finger to help.  
"HELP US!" She looked towards the origin of the shout and saw Thorin waving, pleading, begging. She watched as Thranduil turned away, leaving us all here to die. She moved forward, laying a comforting hand on Thorin's shoulder, but as soon as he realized who it was, it was forcibly shoved her from him.  
"I need no assistance from you, _Elf_!" He stated, then stormed away, leaving Vana standing there wondering how Thorin could have said that to her, he was one of her oldest friends and he pushed her away as if she was something horrid. _Could this day become any worse?_ She asked herself. Vana wished someone could have prepared her for the events to come.

««««««««»»»»»»»»

Vana finally spotted Dwalin after the colony of dwarves made camp for the night. He was sitting by a fire with his brother, Balin, who looked up as she walked closer.  
"Are you alright? Are you both alright?" She looked over at Balin and received a nod in answer. Returning her focus back to her husband, Vana noticed the shaking of his body and the clenching of his fists.  
"Brother." Balin exclaimed warningly. Vana looked to him in confusion, but her gaze was quickly drawn back to Dwalin when he suddenly stood, grasping her elbow in a bruising grip and forcing her to follow. She winced when he added more pressure to his grip.  
"Dwalin? Dwalin, what's wrong? Love?" She asked, confusion and hurt warring in her eyes, she barely took notice of Balin demands for his brother to let her go, that it wasn't her fault. Dwalin, giving in to those demands, shoved her on the ground, standing tall and firm over her, while Balin just turned his head in pity, knowing there was no way he could stop his brother from what he was about to do next.  
"How dare you call me that, _Elf_! I will not be tolerated to be called that by such filth!" his thundering voice confusing her more. He has never had a problem with her half Elven, half Dwarven heritage before, so why was he now. As she heard someone approaching and looked to see Thorin walking towards them, she understood. He was blaming her, or rather her elven side for the tragedy that had occurred; for the selfish actions of Thranduil.  
"Y-you would reject me? Your _One_ for the actions of one elf?" she asked, as she dragged herself from her position on the ground. However, his answer to her questions made her want to cower on the ground once more.  
"_My One!_ How could elvish filth be my One? How could Mahal be that cruel! I can't even stand looking at you. I will never take you as my one." he once again thundered down at her. Looking into his eyes and seeing the hatred and coldness, she made her decision.  
"V-very well, I will not burden you any longer." She pronounced looking at the ground, missing the flash of agony in Dwalin's eyes and the pity in Balin's, all the while Thorin looked on proudly, "You will not have to look upon us any longer." She stated firmly, her gaze hardening. She turned away from them all. Before any of the dwarves could ask about her slip of the truth, she was gone. Thorin went to clap his friend on the shoulder, but Dwalin dodged the limb and walked away, the pain of rejecting his one flowing out of him in waves.  
Vana ran until she was out of breath and her body forced her to collapse in exhaustion. Only then did she let her pain show. Vana cried and sobbed for all she was worth, her hand moving to her lower abdomen and a sense of warmth coursing through her.  
"Don't worry baby, Momma will look after you."


	2. Chapter 1 - Rivendell

CHAPTER ONE – RIVENDELL

"Common Tongue"  
"Quenya/Sindarin (_Elven)"  
"**Khazad (Dwarven)**"_

"Elves!"  
Thorin Oakenshield spat, before throwing the arrow aside. Thorin's eyes captured Gandalf's gaze, but before he could question the wizard, Dwalin's voice rang out, "I cannot see where the pathway leads, do we follow it or no?"  
Bofur called out before Thorin had the chance, "Follow it of course." All of the dwarves eagerly following the narrow walk way, missing the wizard's mutter, "I think that would be wise."

The bottom of Thorin's battle axe hit the ground with a thud. The dazed faces of awe upon his company angering him even more. Before he could comment, Gandalf's voice broke the silence.  
"The valley of Imlardis. In common tongue it is known by another name-."  
"Rivendell." The hobbit of the company interrupted.  
Thorin made his way to Gandalf, "This was your plan all along," he glared up at the wizard, "To seek refuge with our enemy."  
The wizard glared back, "You have no enemies here, Thorin Oakenshield. The only ill will you will find in this valley is that of which you bestow upon yourself."  
"You think the elves will give our quest their blessing?" the dwarf asked, "They will try to stop us."  
"Of course they will. But we have questions that need to be answered." The wizard retorted and the dwarf sighed in defeat, however Gandalf continued, "If we are to be successful this will need to be handle with tact and respect, and no small degree of charm. Which is why you will leave the talking to me." Then, the decent in to the valley began.  
When the company arrived in the courtyard they were greeted by a tall, dark haired elf.  
"Mithrandir." He called in greeting to Gandalf.  
"Ah, Lindir." Gandalf replied and the elf held a hand to his chest in reply.  
"_We heard you had crossed into the Valley."_ The Lindir queried in elvish.  
Gandalf, however, replied in the common tongue, "I must speak with Lord Elrond."  
"My Lord Elrond is not here."  
"Not here? Where is he?" Gandalf asked in curiosity. Before the elf could answer an elvish horn echoed through the valley and a stampede of horses circles the dwarves.  
"Gandalf." Lord Elrond greeted.  
"Lord Elrond." The wizard replied in kind, _"My friend. Where have you been?"  
_"_We've been hunting a pack of Orcs that came up from the South." _Replied the elf lord, before dismounting his horse, _"We slew a number near the Hidden Pass." _He then embraced Gandalf then continued, "Strange for Orcs to come so close to our borders. Something or someone has drawn them near."  
"Ah, that may have been us," Gandalf stated, glancing toward the group of dwarves. Both he and Lord Elrond turned as Thorin walked forward.  
"Welcome Thorin, son of Thrain." Lord Elrond greeted.  
"I do not believe we have met." Thorin replied, the demand to know the elf underlying in his tone.  
"You have your grandfather's bearing. I knew Thror when he ruled under the mountain."  
"Indeed. He made no mention of you." Thorin shot back rudely. Lord Elrond replied in silence, staring at the would-be King Under the Mountain, before speaking in elvish.  
"_Come, prepare the food, and let us feast with our guests."_ One of the dwarves, Master Gloin, spoke up hearing the elf speaking in his tongue.  
"What is he saying? Does he offer us insult!" he spoke, stepping forward and holding his axe in a threatening manner. The rest of the dwarves murmured in agreement, bristling toward the elves. Gandalf intervened before things got out of hand.  
"No, Master Gloin, he is offering you food." The dwarves created a circle, muttering, deciding whether to accept the offering. They all turned and Master Gloin spoke up once again.  
"Ah! Well, in that case lead on." The dwarves again, murmuring in agreement and making to move forward, however the loud neigh of a horse and the clapping of hooves again the ground interrupted any further movement. A black stallion road towards them, the galloping pace slowing until the great beast came to a stop in front of Gandalf and Lord Elrond. The rider, dressed in a dark green cloak and hood threw an Orcish sword to the elvish Lord's feet before speaking in elvish.  
_"All bar one warg and it's scum rider escaped. I managed to slay off the rest of the warg pack, as well as the orcs. I apologise, others distracted me so the one could get away." _The rider held their hand to their chest and bowed in apology. Elrond just smiled, before speaking in the common tongue.  
"It is fine, young one. Even one such as myself could not have slain each one of the Orcs. Are you wounded?" the elf questioned.

Aranel couldn't understand why Lord Elrond did not respond in elvish, however she replied in kind.  
"Nay, there is nothing to worry over, just a scratch." She said as the dismounted her horse, her small stature only allowing her form to reach the stead's shoulder. Aranel parsed an elf the reigns to her horse and turned to the elven Lord, who looked her over before giving a nod of approval.  
"Very well, come meet our guests." Elrond gestured to the left, and only then did Aranel take notice if the unlikely group of thirteen dwarves, a wizard and a Halfling, an oddity in itself. After assessing the group, she looking to the wizard and a smile spread over her face, "Gandalf," she breathed, pushing back her hood then embracing the fellow.  
"Ah! Aranel! My, my how you have grown." The wizard stated fondly, embracing the girl as if she was a daughter.  
"This is unexpected, but welcome. Tell me, why are you gallivanting around these parts with dwarves? And a _hobbit_ no less?" she queried, looking up at the old man, before once again looking over the bizarre company. Her emerald eyes catching and holding the gaze of a young dwarf of around her age. He had blonde hair, a few braids falling around his face and a braided mustache, framing his mouth, he had a regal look about him. After analyzing his feature, she again met his gaze before looking back toward Lord Elrond as he spoke.  
"Aranel, may I present Thorin Oakenshield." He gestured to a dark haired dwarf with blue eyes, who stepped forward at the introduction.  
"Thorin, son of Thrain?" she questioned, peering at the King of Erebor. "It is an honor to meet you, although you may not be appreciative of the circumstances." The dwarf only looked at her, confused with her words, however she looked back to Gandalf. "Tell me Mithrandir, however did you manage to get _Thorin Oakenshield_ to step one foot in Rivendell?"  
The wizard only smiled in return.  
"Come, let us feast."

Fili, son of Dis and nephew to Thorin could only stare in awe at the beauty of this woman. Her crimson, auburn curls flowing around her face, contrasting greatly again her pale and creamy complexion. Her eyes, brighter than any emerald of all the gems in Erebor and her ruby red lips. _Absolutely magnificent. _He thought to himself as he watched her converse with Balin. She had been introduced as she came to eat, flowing onto the balcony in a light green dress that highlighted her eyes, looking like an angel. Her laughter broke through his thoughts and he looked to see what amused her so. Mister Bilbo had been telling her of the gathering in his home.

"They just barged in, they did! Eating everything in their path, pillaging the pantry; throwing 'round my mother's hundred year old dishes! A disaster I tell you." The hobbit exclaimed, it was exerting just thinking of the horror.  
"I hardly doubt it was that bad. Although I have never been to a dwarvish gathering, I have heard they are quite merry events." The dwarves murmured in agreement, Aranel then continued, "I do believe that you all have me at a disadvantage."  
"And how do you suppose that lass?" Bofur called from the other table.  
"You all know my name, however I know none of yours apart from Master Balin here. Actually, Balin sound familiar, are you sure that we have not crossed paths before?" the girl queried, looking over to the white-bearded dwarf.  
"I believe we have not. I never forget a face, lass."  
"If you are certain. Back to the matter at hand, onward with the introductions." She loudly stated, startling Bilbo just left of her as he was sipping his drink, causing him to spell some on his shirt. "Oh, sorry Master Baggins. I thought you would have been used to the loudness of a group of dwarves by now."  
"It appears not." The hobbit replied absentmindedly, dabbing at his shirt with a napkin from the table. Balin decided to get on with the introductions.

"Well lass, across from us you have Dori, and his youngest brother Ori, and the middle child Nori is seated on the end on the other table. Then you have young Fili here," she made eye contact with Fili, green once again locking with blue, however Balin continued, knocking her out of the faze, "then his younger brother Kili over there," the aged dwarf said, pointing to a young dark haired dwarf, "then there is Bombour," the large orange-headed dwarf nodded to her, "then his brother Bofur, that one there with the hat; then their cousin Bifur. After that there are Oin, the resident healer of the group, and his brother Gloin," Balin pointed to the dwarf left of Bilbo," then of course there is my brother Dwalin, and lastly Thorin Oakenshield, King, Under the Mountain." The old dwarf then looked over to the young lass, only to find her shaking, due to the fact it was a warm afternoon he deducted that there was something wrong. "You alright lassie?"  
"Dwalin? Dwalin, son of Fundin?"  
"Yes, my brother, what ails you?" The lass however, didn't answer, rushing to her feet, removing herself from the table, therefore capturing the attention of everyone in the area.

Aranel stormed over to Lord Elrond, before thundering loudly,  
"Why are they here? How could you let them even step one foot in this place?" she then looked to Gandalf, "And you Mithrandir? How could you even stand in their presence, knowing what they did?"  
The old wizard merely looked upon her with a sympathetic gaze. The dwarf king however was not so silent, the pent up fury and distress in the elves' presence added with this new outburst against dwarves was more than enough to set him off. "What concern is it of yours, **_she-elf filth_**?" the dwarves in the room, as well as Elrond and Gandalf had gone silent at the insult. Aranel, however, was not so easily deterred.  
"How _dare_ you speak to me in such a manner? Is that what you said to her as you cast her out?"  
"What are you talking about?" Dwalin questioned the outraged girl, coming to defend his king. However the dwarf warrior still flinched when her striking cold gaze landed on him.  
"Did you know that elves _die_ from a broken heart? The _fade _away to _nothing_!" the dwarves looked at each other confused, not know what this had to do with the argument, but the lass continued, "The fact that she was only half made _no difference_." After she stated this, still staring at Dwalin with her cold, hardened gaze, the brute of a dwarf, Thorin and Balin froze, connecting the facts in their heads, whilst the other looked at them even more confused. There gaze was then directed to Dwalin with more confusion, even a hint of disgust as the girl still continued.  
"How could any dwarf _reject_ their _One_?"


	3. Chapter 2 - Strange Feelings & Decisions

CHAPTER TWO – STRANGE FEELINGS AND DECISIONS

"Common Tongue"  
"Quenya/Sindarin (_Elven)"  
"**Khazad (Dwarven)**"_

Dwalin stared at the young lass, wondering how she could have known this. Thorin, Balin and himself, so that there were no questions about her sudden disappearance, created the tale that Vana had perished when Smaug attacked Erebor. Confusion and wonder soon were replaced with the anger and pain of losing his One.  
"How dare ye talk of things ye know naught of!" He yelled at the girl, stepping forward threateningly but being held back by half of the company.  
"Things that I know naught of? You are the one who knows _nothing_! Did you ever find out why Vana was so happy and excited that day?" Aranel took a step forward, "did you ever find out why she just had to see you straight after coming from the physician?" She closed the distance between them, her face inches from his," She. Was. With. Child." Dwalin froze, pain taking over every aspect of his features, but still the lass continued, "It is your fault I grew up without a mother! It is your fault she died!" Aranel was almost screeching now, Elrond and an astounded Fili hauling her backwards.  
"_It's your fault she died!" _She repeated before Lord Elrond managed to drag her back inside, a worried Fili following.

Balin was in shock, his mind reeling as he and Thorin also dragged Dwalin away and to the area they were privileged to stay. The whole way Dwalin what mumbling under his breath, Balin only catching snippets that sounded like "_She's dead?...Pregnant?... Daughter?"_  
Together they hauled him onto a chair before finally exhaling. It wasn't long before Dwalin spoke,  
"She was overly excited that day, ye know." Balin sighed,  
"Brother, don't do this to yourself." But Dwalin continued.  
"She did tell me she had just come from the physician; I interrupted her because I was so worried whether or not she would be okay. She was about to say something, but the shout from the watchtower stopped her, I didn't give her time to tell me, I had to make sure she was safe. She told me she loved me." He laughed bitterly, "And how did I return that? By casting her and _our child_ to their deaths?"  
Thorin just sat there quietly. Vana had been one of his oldest friends, they had grown up together, and he had been the one to introduce her to Dwalin. He inwardly sighed. He pushed her away when she only sought to comfort and help. Thorin sighed before speaking,  
"You can't blame yourself for this Dwalin." This however, did not seem to have an effect, if not, it only made Dwalin worse, his infamous temper finally peeking through.  
"_Not blame myself? NOT BLAME MYSELF?_ Tis all my fault though! I should have listened to her, and NOT you!" by now Dwalin was standing, glaring venomously at Thorin, "I should have never listened to you! She was right, none of it was her fault! She _was_ there! Helping, getting people to safety! And I foolishly cast her out, rejecting our bond!" Balin dragged Dwalin away from Thorin before things got out of hand. His younger brother just sighed and once again sat down.  
"_I rejected my One! And now she's dead!" _He whispered brokenly.

"HOW COULD YOU LET THEM STAY HERE! KNOWING WHAT HE DID?" Aranel shouted at both Gandalf and Elrond while Fili stood behind her, hand on her elbow and trying to calm her down. She was strangely comforted by his touch. The feeling scared her but she couldn't bring herself to pull away. She sighed before speaking again, "Just please Gandalf, keep him away from me. I don't think I could look at him knowing that he rejected us," she looked down to the floor. All three males in the room looked upon her with pity, Fili starting to slowing smooth his hand on her arm in a soothing gesture. The wizard caught Lord Elrond's eye before speaking, "You will have to face him sometime my girl."  
"Yes, well I hope I will never have to. I don't think I could." Aranel shook her head before walking away. Fili looked after her longingly before dragging his eyes to meet Gandalf's, a question is his gaze. The wizard thought for a moment before nodding. Fili wasted no more time and followed after the distress lass. Watching after him Lord Elrond spoke to Gandalf, "Mithrandir, you don't think that-?" The wizard however cut him off.  
"Oh, I am most certain that they are." The wizard said with a small twinkle in his eye.

"Aranel! Wait, Aranel!"  
She turned as she heard Fili's call. Watching him rush towards her, worry clear in his eye warmed her heart. She decided that she quite liked this dwarf, no matter what other prejudices his race may have cast upon her. When he finally caught up she asked him, "Why are you bothering? Would you not rather be with your fellow dwarves? Your brother?"  
He just looked at her with warmth in his gaze, "But I wanted to see if you were okay."  
She smiled at this and Fili though that it was a good sign.  
"Well thank you for your concern." Fili just nodded. Aranel noticed the tension in the air and before the silence would turn awkward she spoke,  
"Would you like to see something?" she asked curiously.  
"What?" he questioned.  
"Follow me," was all she calmly said before grabbing his hand and dragging him down the corridor. She led him to a high balcony on one of the watch towers, overlooking the elven city. The stars shining brightly, twinkling away against the dark navy skies.  
"It's beautiful, isn't it?" Fili slowly turned his gaze to the breathtaking creature on his right, taking her in. It was apparent to him now that she had dwarven blood, resulting in her small stature, but as he thought of the dwarven blood running through her veins a thought pooped into his mind. Could she feel it? Could she feel their bond? Can she identify him as her One? He had to ask, had to be sure.  
"Can you feel it?" he said lowly.

"Can you feel it?" he said lowly.

Aranel dragged her gaze from the skies to the magnificent male next to her.  
"Feel what?" He simply took her hand in his and held it to his heart.  
"This." he stated, looking deep into her eyes.  
"I-I." Aranel tried to understand, but, the longer she looked into his beautiful blue eyes, she felt it, that small spark. She also felt the closing gap between their bodies. Strangely, she did not care, one bit.  
"What does this mean?" she whispered, her lips centimetres from his.  
"You're my One." He whispered back, almost feeling the feathery touch of her lips. Suddenly, he was ripped out of his daze as he abruptly pulled back.  
"What!?" she almost yelled, "Your One? I can't be. I won't be! I have seen firsthand the way dwarves treat their Ones! I have felt the pain of this bond! I will not have it!" She turned, storming back down the stairway and away from _him_.

Fili could only stare after her retreating figure, the pain and agony of his One's rejection stinging, like a dagger through the heart. He knew that it would be a sore topic for her, but he had hoped that the strength of their bond would push past that pain. Apparently not, he thought, staring into the space she had once been, the heartbreak slowly seeping through his body.


	4. Chapter 3 - Seeing Her

CHAPTER THREE

"Common Tongue"  
"Quenya/Sindarin (_Elven)"  
"__**Khazad (Dwarven)**__"_

Aranel rushed into her room, almost slamming the door behind her and taking a deep breath. She walked forward to the washing basin and splashed some water onto her face. Before she could even think of what happened minutes before a knock rang throughout the room. Walking to the door and opening it, she was greeted with Gandalf's kind face.  
"Hello my dear." He said.  
"Gandalf," Aranel replied in welcome, holding open the door to her chambers. The wizard took the invitation, walking into the room a little ways before turning n her.  
"Aranel, my dear friend, how would you feel about accompanying me on the remainder of this adventure."  
Aranel just looked at him as if he was insane and shook her head in disbelief.  
"Me? Go with you? With the dwarves? To the Lonely Mountain? You must be joking!"  
"I am far from joking. I have spoken to Lord Elrond and he believes that it will be good for you."  
"Be good for me? Who is he to decide what is good for me? I am old enough to choose my own fate, and I will not allow my life to be held in the hands of a dwarf!"  
"Aranel please, you cannot hate him forever, he was only doing what he thought was right at the time. He regrets it more than anything, you saw the pain in his eyes when your mother was mentioned. You saw the suffering that he went through."  
Aranel couldn't stand any more of this. _The suffering that _he_ went through?_  
"How dare you!" The young elf spun on the wizard in a mad fury, "How could you say such a thing? The suffering that _he _went through? What about the suffering that my mother went through? What I went through? Have you been to visit her recently? Have you seen what he caused?"  
The tears started to run down her cheeks as she turned and walked to the other side of the room. The wizard gazed upon her with sympathy.  
"Yes, yes I have seen her."  
"Then you know that she does not have much longer?"  
"Yes." The wizard sighed, and looked down.  
"Then you realize that I cannot leave at a time like this? That I cannot leave her like this? I will not let her die on her own. I can't do that Gandalf, I won't let anyone abandon her again, especially myself."  
The wizard gave no answer, and as Aranel turned to look at him, he was gone.

Dwalin sat there in one of the elvish gardens, wallowing in his own misery. _What have I done?_ He asked himself over and over again. How could he have left not only his One to her death, but his own child? He thought of his daughter, his strong and fierce daughter, "_She is a force to be reckoned with." _Balin had said earlier, "_She seems to have your temper." _He had only huffed in response. _Ay, that she has. _She really was a beautiful lass, the exact picture of her mother, only with his eyes. Dwalin looked down, _Vana_, he thought, _I am sorry my love._ He eyes had started to water when he heard footsteps coming toward him. He had just wiped them away as his brother and the elf came into view. His brother approached him first.  
"Brother, he has requested to speak with you." Dwalin only gave a grunt in reply. Balin opened his mouth to argue but the elf interrupted him.  
"It is about your daughter," he hesitated before continuing, "and Vana."  
Dwalin looked up at this.  
"What of them?" The elf looked at Balin, but when it seemed like the old dwarf wasn't going to leave he turned to Dwalin.  
"It is something better discussed alone." Dwalin nodded to his brother and after he had left, gestured for the elf to speak.  
"I know you must realize that you are not in Aranel's best of graces at this point in time. I suggest that you speak with her." Lord Elrond spoke again, not allowing the dwarf to object, "But, I would suggest you do it after." He then stood, "Come, you need to see something."  
Dwalin eyed the elf with suspicion before pulling himself up to follow the elf. He was lead through a series of twisted stairways and into a tower in the heart of the elvish city. They stopped when they reached a set of chambers. The elf hesitated before opening the door.  
"I must warn you, this is not what you were expecting to see, but I wish for you to be delicate about it, be gentle with her." The dwarf was about to protest, thinking that the elf had tricked him into speaking with his daughter before he felt he was ready. Suddenly, he was shoved into the room and the door closed off behind him. Remembering the elf's warning to handle the situation gently, Dwalin slowly turned to look around the empty room. It was simple, elvish in style, but what caught Dwalin's attention were the dwarvish runes that were etched onto the walls in a disarray of patterning. The words were jumbled, not making any sense, making Dwalin frown in confusion. This state of mind was not held long as a loud crash from the adjoining room made him whirl around and reach for his axe, before realizing that he was unarmed. He proceeded with caution into the next room, but froze when he saw her. Laying on the bed, blankets and pillows cushioning her was his Vana. She sat there on the bed, staring out the window with a distant look in her eye. Before Dwalin realized it had happened, his was standing beside her, looking down over his One. He fell to his knees with realization. After it had burned into his mind that this was Vana, this really was _his One_ in front of him, he stood and scooped her small petite frame into his arms, fell back onto the bed and wept, muttering apologies over and over again. After minutes of this, Dwalin realized that she had not replied, in fact not responded in any way. With this in mind, Dwalin took the time to gaze at his beloved. She was as she was when he came into the room, the distant gaze in her eyes scaring him as he tried to get her to look at him. He put both of his hands on her cheeks and turned her head and her eyes rolling toward him, the action made no difference. No matter how long she seemingly gazed into his eyes, there was no hint of recognition, no emotions, just nothing.

"She has been like this for almost twenty years, she started to fade after Aranel was brought into this world." Dwalin looked over to see the elf once again standing in the doorway of the adjoining rooms.  
"I don't understand, what happened to her." Dwalin asked, turned back to his One, not able to take his eyes off her for more that a second.  
"When an elf fades, it is almost as if their soul is slowly leaving their body. Eventually, there is nothing left for the body to hold, but, it still lives. It is the decision of those around the faded whether to give them the mercy they deserve." Dwalin couldn't look away from his beloved, the elf continued, "Aranel, she won't allow it, she thought she could find a way to help her mother, to bring her back."  
Dwalin perked up at this, "How could she do that?"  
The elf sighed before continuing, "She was going to find you."  
Dwalin was shocked, "Find me? Why?" The young lass hated him, which was clear. And she had every right to, this was all his fault.  
"She believed that you could somehow bring Vana back, call her soul back to this world. She thought that if you apologized then, maybe, Vana would have a good enough reason to live."  
"And Aranel is not enough?"  
"Aranel seems to think not."

Aranel walked along the long corridor towards the dining hall. She came to a halt in the doorway, watching the merriness of the dwarves. She looked at their laughing faces, seeing the care and respect each held for the other. Dragging her gaze through the dwarves, she looked for that one, _Fili._ She just needed to see him, there was a pull, one that she couldn't ignore.  
She found him in a dark corner, sitting behind his gleeful brother. Tears welted up in her eyes when she made eye contact, he looked so miserable. She tore her gaze away, before walking to the nearest balcony. She isn't good enough, someone as loving and caring as he deserves someone so much more. She cannot even keep her mother in this world. She was never good enough.


End file.
